"Baby will you hold this Tether?"

Women, when we get involved with a man we need to be clear about our roles and expectations. What exactly are you willing to be accountable to in this relationship. Will you cook? Clean? What are the dos and don't of you sexual willingness? And most importantly...Will you tether the balloon?

That lady in Colorado, whose name I refuse to print, whose son will forever be known as Balloon Boy, (even though he was in the attic); whose storm-chasing husband did everything but stick a remote in his own butt when his flying saucer got away is really sad!!
Not because she turned her kids into media freaks, but because she allowed herself to pretend to be a giant silver balloon tether-er.
Tell me this lady had nothing better to do on a sunny day than take responsibility for the ropes holding her husbands inflatable UFO to the ground.
Ladies, when you marry a man you need to draw the line. I know we all make sacrifices like handing our bodies over to pregnancy, cooking meals we'd rather not eat, hosting football gatherings, agreeing to appear on a Wife Swapping shows...but a girl has to draw the line somewhere.
What wife doesn't know that sick feeling a woman gets in her stomach when her mans enjoyment of a lame and ridiculous hobby is ruined by her disinterest/clumsiness. Who among us has never accidentally dropped a screw-driver in a rad, scratched a motorcycle with our fashion footwear, served the wrong snack at half time or dropped the last beer. But come on!
When your husband the storm chaser builds a giant foil saucer, buys some helium, turns on a video camera its time to find some errands to run. Please don't be standing there with that "oh, tether...I thought you said feather" look on your face when the dumb thing takes off.