Bobby Sherman, Yoga Pants and Mr. Peanut

A quick show of hands: How many of you ladies own at least one pair of “Yoga Pants”. Okay now, those of you with your hands up... if you’ve actually been to a yoga class please stand.
I see,
only a few...
Now, everyone please take your seat.

Oh, one more question for those of you who own the pants but have never actually attended the class;
Do you ever harbour any guilt about participating in the Yoga-pants fashion trend without and legitimate justification? I only ask because I would be hesitant to don full cycling gear and venture out without a bicycle.

Definition of Yoga: “Yoga is an ancient art based on a harmonizing system of development for the body, mind, and spirit. The continued practice of yoga will lead you to a sense of peace and well-being, and also a feeling of being at one with their environment.”
Definition of Yoga Pants: Well you’ll have to read it for yourself as I have chores to do:
but the thing that struck me the most was that the popular Lululemon yoga pant sells for about $108 American dollars. And product review contains the phrase “Many a yogini swears these reversible pants are the ones that make her butt look its best.”OH!
Well then!
( I read it twice to make sure I wasn’t hallucinating.)

I guess those “Yogini’s” (is that even a word?) haven’t yet achieved that “sense of peace and wellbeing” and are still stuck in the “how does my ass look in these over-prices sweats” phase of their emotional growth.

I don’t actually own a pair of Yoga pants, (cuz I don’t have $108) and have never been to a yoga class. I do have friends that have the pants. They might go to Yoga and just aren’t talking about it but as far as I can tell they mostly wear them to grocery shop and drink. They think “Upward Dog” is a little-known rapper from Oakville.

“Yoga pants” as far as I can tell are just sweat pants with a flared bottom. In other arms of the clothing industry they might refer to them as “boot cut sweats”- but if they did that, certain people might actually attempt to wear them with boots- You know who you are.

I mostly hate them because OLD NAVY is pushing them. Old Navy has a habit of describing a product like it comes with an adventure. I disowned them when they came up with the “Alpine Hoody” a hooded sweatshirt with furry lining whose name implied a promise of a Chalet vacation. I also won’t be buying one of those “Cabana Dresses” they advertise. They’re product names are an insult to consumers.
I stopped believing what I saw in commercials the day I pulled the Bobby Sherman record from my box of Sugar Crisp and it refused to work on my Mickey Mouse turn table. So, enlightenment for $19.98?
I don’t think so.

I mean, don’t get me wrong- Yoga Pants are cool. But they aren’t as cool as a monocle. I wouldn’t sport a monocle without knowing at least a few of Mr. Peanuts dance moves.


But I understand completely. We all like to think we are moving towards enlightenment eventually.
So it’s nice to know that when the day to make that first step towards “peace and wellbeing” comes, you won’t have to rush out for some pants to do it in.